indieVISUAL Journal 2010

I'm not a very good artist... at all but I've decided to take on this challenge that I learned from http://charlie2010.tumblr.com/ and http://indievisualjournal.blogspot.com/ and draw a picture for everyday like a picture journal... cool, right? I'm very excited for this. So while I'm with my friends on new years day I will attempt to draw a picture. Who knows maybe I'll get better through this process. The pictures will be posted on http://emilielovesbuses.tumblr.com/ YAY! So if you read this I hope you start the project too =D

RIP Jimmy "The Rev" Sullivan

I don't know if any of you care or know who he is but Jimmy "The Rev" Sullivan was one of the most amazing drummers and now he's gone. I'm in tears which you might think is stupid but Avenged Sevenfold's music saved my life which most don't know. It sucks I had to learn about this through twitter but I did. Seeing him live was one of the coolest experiences ever. You were one of the greatest and forever will be Jimmy RIP

How do you not be depressed? I'm trying my hardest. I WILL NOT BE DEPRESSED! GAHHH! Life is fabulous and I need to move on.

Christmas kind of really sucked. How can someone be grateful for a giant remote control then lots of yelling. Fuck. My. Life.

Merry Christmas blog. I really wish my dad was at least alive to say merry Christmas to. I miss him a lot.

Oh blog that no one reads, why do I stay friends with people that make me depressed? I don't know if they mean to but they will say or do something that just makes me sad. I'm terrified of abandonment and Kamaria and Sinclair saying they're probably going to Darlington hurt a lot. I've had so many people leave that I cared about more than the Earth and that started all of this.

Am I not meant to be happy? Is that what it is? Is that why I constantly seem to be broken no matter how hard I try to be happy? I don't think I can fake being happy much longer. I really need a change...

My life is an integrated circuit

Oh blog it has been a while. So much has happened, most rather depressing. Christmas is almost here and I'm not excited. I don't get to call my dad and talk to him for hours and hours about random things he was my true best friend, the only person I could depend on and now he's gone. I miss my best friend Clara with a passion and we've drifted apart. I can't really trust anyone and I've been almost used once again. I've tried to be happy for my friends sake I can't stand people worrying over me. I'm not important. But I have new friends that I care about so much and my best friend in this country even though we might not have classes together next semester. The worst of all is the boy I think I really loved found someone else when I thought he felt the same and now I just can't be happy for my friends who have found boyfriends or girlfriends. I'm terrified to die alone or be alone, it's not something I handle well. I should go now and stop moping. Goodbye for now blog.

No words can describe this yet I'm typing it all out...

So there's this guy that I happen to like a lot and he is all oh I'm going to hug you today oh wait now I'm going to ignore you for three days oh no now I'm going to poke your stomach because I'm a fugging hot immature guy that won't ask you out because I probably don't like you I'm just a typical guy and act all flirty even though I know you like me. I really really want to go up to him and be like "hey I like you" but I'm way to scared he'll like reject me or stop talking to me. I hate being depressed about this one stupid boy he shouldn't effect me this much but for some reason he does. I really really wish I didn't like him so none of this would be happening and I really want someone to talk to but I don't want to annoy the living hell out of people because I know others have problems so I really shouldn't be complaining but this sucks so bad. It seems like I don't even really have a best friend I can talk to about everything. Don't get me wrong I have some of the most made of awesome friends ever but not one I can have a girly sleepover with and talk about every suckish thing that has happened and how guys suck. I guess I should just suck it up but I really needed to vent and maybe if anyone actually reads this get advice...

Oh hello interwebs

It's been quite a while. Well I've been baking and modeling a lot recently it's nice. Just started high school too, it's not as bad as middle school was which is great! Recently had family time in cartersville that was very interesting it made me realize how much I adore these people I call my family. So anyway. I'm going to start making actual youtube videos and I have a collab channel with my best friend Sabrina called BreakingTheDice and we are gonig to make random vlogs and skits and on my personal channel I'm going to make vlogs and an occasional skit and makeup/ hair tutorial. So anyway if anyone is reading thanks and well I'll write later =]

I seem to be drifting away from everyone I care for most. It's not the best feeling. I've become attached to clothes, doing my own hair, and having alone time rather then going out and having fun. I need to sort this out before school starts.

Find me on polyvore.com =D

Find me on Polyvore

Well hello ^_^

It's been a while...hm... lol my hair is cut and there is a dance I do not want to go to on Friday. My friends are going to drag me. Anyways this was just really random because I'm bored... I will think of something to put here.... BYE!

Poptart Sprinkle & The Candy Kidz and other random things that are going through my head at the moment.

I wish I got that show here. If anyone does could you please find a way for me to watch it? Poptart Sprinkle is one of my six idols I love her! Her voice is different and it's amazing. I should probably be in bed. Oh well check out Poptart Sprinkle & The Candy Kidz myspace it is very colorful! OH!! I heard McFly is supposed to come to America real sooN! I hope it's true I would be so happy my face would probably freeze in a smile! Joe Brooks is back in England -sobs- I wish he would come back I want to see him in concert. I hope 100 Monkeys tours soon! That would be awesome!! Today I went through the whole day thinking it was Friday. Then I missed my bus a long with a lot more people from my bus. Good times. Then I did my friend Heartleigh's hair & I put purple in it but the purple didn't stay so I'm going to try again saturday. Hm what else. Well it was a busy day. Well I have nothing else to say so I'm going to go lay down and write my story. =D Claryy if you're reading this I love you soo much and I know I promised I would be on but I didn't know it was Wednesday and I'm so busy on Wednesday's. I love you!

My dearest darlingest Clara!

I am so very sorry we haven't talked in forever. I've been uber busy! I try to get on AIM on my brothers cell phone but it doesn't work and I get depressed. But NO WORRIES!!! In the next two weeks I am completely well almost completely free! Next week is an early release week and the week after that I don't have classes! So my dearest I will probably talk to you tomorrow. I love you dearly! (haha I've been very formal with this) OHH I also have a surprise for you!!!

RaindropsandSodapop <3

I have absolutely nothing to blog about so I'm going to talk about my plans for the weekend. =D Yippee! Not that anyone cares ha ha. First my friend Alex is coming over & we are going to have a little two person birthday party with us and my llama!We are going to have tons of soda, candy, cake, and anything sweet we can get our hands on! Then Saturday we're going to see The Uninvited and go to the mall, I'm going to wear blue leopard print tights, my Skye Sweetnam Sound Soldier t shirt, and my pink tutu with shorts underneath them. Or my green pants with my tutu over top... hmm decisions decisions... Alex is going to wear her zebra print pants and her skullanimals suit t shirt and she is going to buy a white tutu at the mall. Okay so whoever read this feel free to follow or comment. Just kidding loveyss (No I'm not...). Oh yeah! ha ha it's finally raining! Sunday and Monday it's supposed to be really cold and raining like below freezing so I'm going to pray that there will be ice on the roads or a snowstorm. Anyone want to pray for me too? Seriously Texas is having ice storms! Why can't we?

I should really be doing my homework but this is important. In a way.

The internet is the greatest thing ever created in my opinion (you know besides life) and yet people are using it to be plain out nasty to each other! I don't get it if you have to waste your life going to people youtube videos, blogs, myspace, etc. and talking trash about them what does that say about you? Sure you can hide behind a screen name but that basically shows you have such a low self esteem that you have to trash otehr people. It's just as bad as doing it in person or behind someone's back but so much worse at the same time. I really don't understand it. Can someone please explain?

Pop, lovely word.

Crazy? More like insane!
Lovely the way you are reading my mind 24/7!
Amazing how much we have in common!
Rooney! One of your favorite bands haha!
Awesome hair!

Okay so it's really lame Sorry!! my mind is dead lol